Rick Burnette Cheaters
I’m not sure how old Rick is but he is in his late 50s, I think. I had to put an age for him, but the age I posted is an approximate age.
I should have profiled him long ago. Somehow, I was unable to profile him on DDHG. He’s not a cheater to my knowledge, but, in my opinion, he “supported” (by taking the cheater’s side) a cheater, one Everett Raymond Brown Jr, aka Jay Brown.
Rick was in a band with Jay Brown, a band called Night Patrol. Rick is married (or was..don’t know if he still is) to a Mari-Ane Fowler, who had/has a high-paying sales position for a company called Judd (not sure about the full name of the company, it was usually referred to in Mari-Ane’s conversations, at her parties, as “Judd”), in Strasburg, Virginia.
Rick was divorced from a former wife, “Kitty” who Jay said cheated on him..now I wonder if that was the truth…about Kitty cheating on Rick. Maybe Rick’s first wife, Kitty, thought that Rick was a b*m (didn’t bring home the bacon), so left him. Mari-Ane was fond of saying, about Rick, “one woman’s garbage is another woman’s treasure.” What about “one friend’s garbage is another friend’s treasure”?
Rick married again, to Mari Ane Fowler; they live/lived in Strasburg, VA. Rick has a daughter named Thai, who cut a CD. [So what Rick. I cut a CD, too. In 2008. And you never heard mine.]
Rumor has it that Rick’s daughter was a stripper or exotic dancer, at one time; if so, I wonder how dysfunctional her family life might have been, for her to have decided to take up that occupation for a time!??! My own father once saved a young woman’s life (someone in her 20’s) who’d been a hooker and a junkie, who had to give up her child for adoption (a thing that made her want to “self-medicate”, to dull the psychological pain.) Because of his mentoring, she gained a successful, legitimate career.
Sometimes non-biological mentoring or parenting can be more effective than biological parenting, to steer a life away from the wrong path. Now THAT’S a MAN…not just someone who helps decide to name his band after the Robert Cray tune, Night Patrol–about how sad it is when young girls fall prey to the s*x trade–, yet looks the other way when/if he hears that one of his band members, a P**N ADDICT, who joined a swingers’ site, sexually abused his girlfriend, or who “doesn’t want to know about it” and sides with the P**N ADDICT, instead, or at least continues socializing with the P**N ADDICT. Jay’s ad on a swingers’ site, in 2000, for casual s*x with bisexuals and strangers, displayed the message: [Title for his ad:] “Bi-Male iso a Man” and “Hi,
I’m a SbiM iso someone to share my other side with. I’m 48 yo, 6/4” 230lbs, good looking(I think) healthy, discreet, regular guy. N.Va. area (Mansassas). I like 69, j/o,”
In case anyone doesn’t know what “j/o” stands for, I believe it’s code for “jacking off [together]”
And if Rick is a republican, like Mari-Ane, his wife, said she was, then the hypocrisy becomes even more apparent.
YES! JAY WAS–PROBABLY STILL IS–A P**N ADDICT! And p**n is what PIMPS show to girls, to “turn them out” as prostitutes! Go figure.
I was Rick’s friend, as well as his wife’s friend, for many years. Rick, it would seem, refused to believe me about Jay being involved in down-low activities.
Well, I hope he sees through Jay’s lies now, because I “dropped off the planet” as Rick’s friend, after Jay dumped me and I had lived with Jay for 8.5 years. I once was a guest to most of Rick’s and Mari-Ane’s parties. That stopped as soon as Jay broke off with me, so another one of my social networks was destroyed by Jay, I allege.
You can read more about Rick, in my profile about Jay, on
datingpsychos dot com,
The last-known e-mail address I have for Rick is email@example.com
I think his phone number is (540) 465-8486 and his area code is
22641. Last I knew, Mari-Ane and he lived in a “mansion” on a hill, in a large white house, with a swimming pool that lit up with laser lights that changed from blue-purple. I spent many a night partying with them, before Jay bolted from my life. My own brother and his wife live in a “mansion” twice that size, in MD. My brother was fortunate to find his fed govt. job back in the 1970’s, when there was not a recession, so was able to retire. Not everyone is that fortunate in life, but at least he didn’t live off the backs of women. I am also not used to being treated like “refuse” by others with “mansions” half the size of my own brother’s. Not boasting here, even diplomats must rent apartments or houses, from time to time, between owning homes. But when a woman believes that a man is HONEST, and for years, that he was not after her “net worth”, it comes as a shock to find out otherwise.
And to Rick…Jay also used to talk about John Leigh, behind his back..said that John’s guitar playing was “stiff”…like he was “holding two pails of water”
Jay said about one guitarist, Bruce Turner, who was formerly the guitarist I hired in my jazz band with Jay, that Bruce’s eyes were “glazed over” whenever he had to learn a new jazz standard. Jay said about Julia Leigh that she was “clinically depressed” and that he suspected John Leigh had something to do with her depression. About Jill (former singer in Change of Heart), he said that she worked as a phone s*x worker before she got married. Yeah, in my opinion, Jay said some nasty things behind the backs of his friends, the way he probably did about me.
I think that Rick came by his good job at Judd because his wife, Mari-Ane got it for him.
Mari-Ane once told me that she was involved in a law suit, I believe—if I recall correctly—that a former employer of hers sued her when she used clients names that were formerly clients of that former employer (Sperry? Sperry-Detweiler?) So I guess that means she didn’t wait the one-year period, by law, that she was supposed to wait, before using those clients. I am still disgusted with how Rick treated me, as if his and Mari-Ane’s “elitist lifestyle” gave them the right to discard me as a friend, especially when Mari-Ane, Julia Leigh (Mari-Ane’s friend, wife to John Leigh) and I, all had something in common back then: we were all stepmothers or helped to raise or mentor other men’s children.
Mari-Ane is/was a republican, and I think raised Catholic. This to me is just another example of how “wealthy” republicans treat democratic women who’ve had a tough time in life gaining careers. Rick, I think, is/was Mari-Ane’s second husband. If I recall correctly, she told me that her first husband was somewhat of a financial risk, and/or took her for a ride. If so, then she should have understood what Jay did to me.
I think Jay saw that his two band buddies had “latched on” to “merger mates” who had homes and established careers, so he wanted the same “merger mate” situation for himself, but believe me, Jay was IN DEBT UP TO HIS EARS, had nothing to “merge” with, had gone bankrupt, and told me that he owed one sister, Paula, $17,000. THAT’S SEVENTEEN THOUSAND DOLLARS, FOLKS! He showed me the document that Paula had him sign. It indicated that were he ever to go bankrupt, Jay would not be allowed to write Paula’s loan to him off.
Oh, and Mari-Ane once told me that she had no college degree, so I wonder how she got those well-paying jobs she held/holds (was she a “mafia daughter”?)
You’ll recognize Mari-Ane if you’ve ever been a guest in her home. She has all kinds of Coca Cola paraphernalia in her kitchen. I think of her as the “Coca Cola” girl.
An old photo, taken in the early 90s or mid 90s, of Jay’s old band, Night Patrol, can be seen on
You can only see Jay, John Leigh, and Bill Rich in this photo, not Rick. Perhaps I will find another photo, where you can see what Rick looked like then, and upload it to this profile.
I have plenty band photos with Rick in them..at least four, one promo photo of Night Patrol; one promo photo of Change of Heart (starring Jill and drummer, Jeff Lodsun, who cheated on his successful, attorney-wife, Beth, and who, in the not-so-distant past, got arrested, I think, for disorderly conduct and/or for being drunk and in the nude); and two photos of Rick performing on stage, with Night Patrol. Perhaps I will post four more brief profiles on Rick, containing just those photos and a reference to this original profile, just so you’ll know what he looked like.
You are judged by the company you keep/kept, Rick and Mari-Ane, and it seems you preferred Jay’s company to my own, are like ostriches with your heads buried in the sand…all because you (THOUGHT you) knew Jay Brown, way before knowing me. Hey..but if you prefer hanging with a perv and (I think) sociopath who sexually and emotionally (and yes, at one point, PHYSICALLY–when throwing keys toward my face, and lifting his fist to it, at one point–) abused me, that’s your choice.
Jay Brown bent/bends reality to his own terms.
When Jay and I stayed in Mari-Ane’s trailer..the one where your mother lived, Rick, I also found a Jimmy Swaggart book, Rape of a Nation, which I assume was your mother’s. I’m guessing you were probably influenced by some Bible-thumping mother, to diss females who don’t get married to their live-in boyfriends, and influenced not to believe in common-law marriages!
To me, Jay Brown, alcoholic, practiced the AA 12 STEPS IN REVERSE!
“1. I declare my complete control over alcohol and everything else; and further declare that my life is in perfect order
2. I recognize no power as great as I am; nor any person as smart as I am, and if you don’t like it come outside
3. I made a decision to run my life and everyone else’s life to suit only me – and I pity those who get in my way.
4. I make a searching and through inventory of everyone other than myself – and find them woefully lacking in all respects; and I never hesitate to tell them so.
5. I admitted to no one, including, G*d and Myself, that there could possibly be anything wrong with me, or my actions.
6. I went to extreme efforts to protect and increase my defects of character-and did a little drinking besides. [O.K., SO HE DIDN’T DO “a little drinking besides”..STILL..THERE ARE SUCH THINGS AS “DRY DRUNKS”!]
7. I continued my obnoxious arrogant air of asking no one for anything-my Big Eye was for telling, not asking.
8. I kept a complete list of all persons who had harmed me, either real or imaginary, and swore to get even with them all.
9. I got even where possible, except when to do so might injure me.
10. I continued to b***h and whine about everything to everyone and, when I was right, promptly reminded them.
11. I sought through scheming and conniving to materially improve myself – at the expense of my fellow man. I ever hesitate, when the opportunity presents itself, to bring disaster and misery to anyone who happens to cross my path.
12. Having had a complete moral, physical, financial and spiritual breakdown, all of my remaining effort was directed toward dragging those near me – and dear to me – down to these same depths of despair [ ]”
I think Jay needed SA (Sexaholics Anonymous, http://www.sa.org/), not AA. But I doubt that even SA would help him, since, apparently his psychological counseling sessions, under Michael Borash,, before he met me and also who he saw at the beginning of our relationship, didn’t seem to help him, before he met me and also who he saw at the beginning of our relationship, didn’t seem to help him.
…but then, I also don’t buy into the AA and SA ideology, either. I attended one meeting once, in a Catholic church, a meeting similar to Alanon, but for partners of sexaholics. I did it after Jay left me. And do you know what the steerer of that committee did? She encouraged the wives of cheating husbands to LOOK THE OTHER WAY, to “not keep track of his inventory”…almost like saying “ignore his abuse.” Sorry but that kind of meeting just wasn’t for me.
It’s just like all those Jack Catholics (like Jack Mormons)..they can treat anyone like c**p during the week, and they only have to go to confession on Sunday to be forgiven it all. It stinks! And Jay REALLY got good at using reverse psychology and all that “co-depenency” jargon (possibly learned from Borash?) against his women, like against Lori, his 2nd wife, for example. Flipping The Script. About her he said she “over-reacted”. What are these male psychologists DOING to us women, anyway? Well, to be fair, it’s not all male psychologists who seem to “approve” of using labels like “bisexual” and who include–put their “rubber stamp” of approval on the “B” in “GBT,” so are female psychologists doing this. Possibly Borash doesn’t do this. And I can’t really blame Borash, either. Some clients/patients JUST CAN’T BE FIXED/CURED. Jay possibly hid his past–what he told me about having oral s*x with his gay cousin, Paul–, from Borash, as well, like he did from others, including from many in his family and many friends of his, who he knew for decades.
So I’m putting Jay ON BLAST, and anyone else in his former “musical circle of friends” who I think either ignored his lies or helped to cover them up.
I obtained, recently, Jay’s 1st wife’s (Pattie’s) confirmation to my own experience of Jay…he treated Pattie in a similar, perverse way. She divulged to me that during her relationship with him, TWO OF HER GAY MALE FRIENDS TOLD HER THEY HAD HAD S*X WITH JAY! Swallow that one, Rick! Stop denying! Do YOU like being disconfirmed or disbelieved, Rick? Well I DON’T, but that’s what happened for years after Jay left my life. People like you (former friends) would not even give me ONE HOUR of their time, hear my side of the story. Perhaps YOU never found yourself in such unfortunate situations like this (leading the “cushy” life you have, it’s much easier to look down on others, or ignore others, who “have not,” I guess. And I doubt your life would be so “cushy” without your wife’s help.)
And I think that’s what Jay sought…a “cushy” life that a FEMALE could provide, when he was “in the red.” It is disgusting to think how, since the feminist movement, suddenly all these men thought it was “o.k.” to be no better than gigolos, so that the s*x roles had to reverse themselves as the “norm”. I see it more and more. Too often, really. This is worse when men fail to realize that, in these poor economic times, not all women (especially women who’ve been disenfranchised for years, who are in midlife) got that “golden opportunity” to have a “cushy” career. They also fail to realize there are other constraints in the workforce: -age discrimination; -sexism; -men still control top positions, especially “traditional” men, who think that only male “heads of family” should hold the better jobs, so don’t want to hire women; -other religious “traditionalists” in the work force, see women that have no wedding rings on, who are in middle age, and think, falsely “something’s wrong with her..she’s not married…she might be a lesbian”, and if religionists are at the helm of those corporations, wanting a “homogenous” workforce, they might not be so flexible with their hiring plans; -male, s*x-addicted partners who make a woman’s life h**l, while she’s vulnerable, training to a new career, males feeding like sharks on their women’s emotional energies, bringing those women down, depressing them; – men “working from home”, like Jay, who seem to have time for affairs with women.
Nepotism, anyone? Not saying that Rick is a “gigolo”, but sometimes it can be a “fine line” between a gigolo and a man who came by his good-paying job because his wife made sure he had one, in her own company. And perhaps Jay Brown got his “big ideas” about “locking onto the purse strings of women” from how Mari-Ane related to her husband Rick, or from women like Mari-Ane..perhaps from his–Jay’s–sisters. Nepotism isn’t allowed in our federal government, otherwise, my own brother possibly could have helped me, on my own career path.
When I informed Rick, about Jay’s “bi-curious” activities on the net, in 2000, I received little more than a perfunctory e-mail reply from Rick, containing, on 8/10/00, “I’m sorry that things are not going well for you and Jay. You have been together for a long time and I know how hard it is to lose someone. All I can say, from my experience, is that the pain will subside with time. I have never talked to Jay about his sexual preferences or heard anything from mutual friends about them. He has only been interested in women as far as I know. Just hang in there, take it day to day and take care of yourself”. It wasn’t so much Rick’s brief message that bothered me (though, I knew then, that Jay had them all “snowed” as to his, Jay’s, sexual identity.) It was what DIDN’T come later from Rick and Mari Ane…the friendship/fellowship that I had enjoyed with them for many years. All invitations to their homes stopped. They, to me, as much as a denied and dismissed my horrible experience. Basically, I felt that they had both “minimized” me as a human being, and my 8-year friendship with that couple…just wrote me off. Julia and John Leigh, another couple with whom we all had socialized for years, had moved to Pennsylvania, yet continued to be invited to Rick and Mari-Ane’s home, for their annual events; whereas, I was LOCAL, a Virginia resident, it was less than an hour’s drive between my home and theirs, yet they never reached out to me, after Jay left me. Just one perfuntory e-mail from Rick, not much more, and NOTHING from his wife, Mari-Ane, the “socialite”.
At least Julia Leigh, wife of John Leigh, and long-time friend to Mari-Ane and Rick, gave me a lengthier, and it seemed to me, more “understanding” reply. Jay told me that John Leigh’s first wife left him for a lesbian, and left him with a developmentally disabled daughter. Perhaps that’s why I found Julia and John to be “kinder” people, because they dealt with that hardship in life, which can tax anyone’s energies. But I also thought that it was usually Julia who held the “career purse” of her family, too, not John, who, last I knew, usually worked as a delivery driver, or at least did so when he and she lived in the D.C. area.
So, I think Jay Brown saw his fellow male band members “latching on” to career women, who, if not wealthy, were able to have or purchase homes, so he wanted the same from his own woman. Yet, he was not willing to buy a home with our money combined, and that’s a good thing, because, had he done so, my good credit more than likely, would have gone down the toilet.
Oh…and no, folks…I do not have Borderline Personality Disorder, am not Bipolar, do not have Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, nor have ever been diagnosed with any of those, nor will ever be. I just want to get out all the details on Jay and his band buddies, so you will know what Jay was/is all about.
I have a B.A. in Communication, had a 3.3 GPA, so I’m not stupid. I would’ve had a 4.0 had not, through have of my first and only marriage, I not been verbally and emotionally abused by my first husband. I think Jay saw how vulnerable I was after my divorce, so went for the jugular.
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First Name: Rick
Last Name: Burnette